Church Family Life

Romans 14 speaks about life in the family of God. As God’s children, how do we relate to each other in God’s holy church? We come from different backgrounds, countries, cultures, and tribes. We are Jews and Gentiles. We eat different foods. Yet we all are children of the heavenly Father who loves us with an everlasting love. We all confessed that Jesus Christ is Lord and that he loved us and died for our sins. And we all are indwelt by the Holy Spirit and delight in the holy Scriptures, which daily teach, rebuke, correct, and train us in righteousness. We all live by the grace of God, which enables us to abound in good works.

We all belong to the kingdom of God, which is righteousness, peace, and joy in the Holy Spirit. We all are justified by grace and not by works of righteousness that we have done. We all are sons and daughters of God through faith in Christ Jesus. As Paul told the Galatians, “There is neither Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female. For you are all one in Christ Jesus” (Gal. 3:28).

As God’s children, we are to relate to one another in love. Love sacrifices for the other. This epistle instructs us to love all God’s children who are born into God’s one family. So earlier Paul exhorted, “Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves” (Rom. 12:9-10); “Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellowman has fulfilled the law… . Love does no harm to its neighbor. Therefore love is the fulfillment of the law” (Rom. 13:8, 10).

We are all brothers and sisters in Christ, so we love one another with the love poured out in our hearts abundantly by the Holy Spirit who dwells in us. Yet there are both strong Christians and weak Christians in God’s one church. There are spiritual infants, young people, and “mature” people. Everyone does not have the same level of gospel understanding. Though by his death and resurrection Jesus abrogated the ceremonial law relating to days and diet and drinks and feasts and fasts and sacrifices, yet there was no official emancipation proclamation on a calendar day saying that all ceremonial laws have been abrogated. The church went through a necessary period of transition. So when Paul wrote this epistle, most Jewish Christians were still living by the ceremonial laws. They were called weak Christians. But most of the Gentile Christians did not concern themselves with these ceremonial laws. They were omnivores; they ate all foods, including meat offered to idols, without any conscience problem. They gave thanks to God and ate.

Most Jewish believers in the church at Rome chose to become vegetarians because it was difficult for them to ensure that the meat was kosher. By not eating meat, they could be sure that their consciences were clear toward God. In doing this, they were following the approach of Daniel. Long before the abrogation of all the ceremonial laws, he chose to be a vegetarian in Babylon. About him and his friends we read, “So the guard took away their choice food and the wine they were to drink and gave them vegetables instead” (Dan. 1:16).

When it came to the truth of salvation, justification by faith, Paul refused to compromise. He boldly declared that we are justified by grace alone through the righteousness of Christ alone freely imputed to us. Christ took all our sins upon himself, and his death is our atonement. He gave us his perfect, divine righteousness, and so we are justified. So we need not fulfill any law to justify ourselves by a legal righteousness of our own. Yet we prove our salvation, our justification, by living holy lives.

But Paul did compromise all his life in adiaphora, in matters that make no difference in regard to salvation. The kingdom of God is not “food and drink” (Rom. 14:17). So weak vegetarians are in God’s kingdom, and strong non-vegetarians are also in God’s kingdom. But it is not a sin to be a vegetarian. We all belong to God’s one family and must love one another. And if your conscience is weak, you are free to eat vegetables all your life. You can abstain from coffee and tea and not use lipstick. You do not need to use medicine and you can do business without trying to make a profit. You can refrain from watching movies and drinking wine. You can wear only white clothes. You can avoid celebrating birthdays and holidays, including Christmas and Easter. You are free to do all of these things.

In this church, we welcome all people and love all God’s children without discrimination. We maintain that evil is found, not in food or drink but in the human heart, as Jesus said (Matt. 15:17–20). Thank God, he has given us a new heart, a new mind, and new affections. Now we love all God’s people, and we pray that weak people, with their weak consciences, will become strong as they adjust their consciences by the ongoing teaching ministry of the church. Conscience is not our final authority. The conscience of a Christian must adjust itself to the word of God as he delights himself in it.

Welcome the Weak

We are commanded, therefore, to receive the weak. Paul is directing strong believers to receive the one who is not convinced that the gospel gives him the freedom to eat meat, especially meat offered to idols and sold in the market. The weak Christian is not sure that the ceremonial laws have been abrogated. The strong are not to force him to eat meat and thus violate his conscience and cause him to sin. The strong are commanded to take the initiative and go out of their way to receive their weak brothers. They are to do so enthusiastically, not just receiving them into the church through baptism and then tolerating them and treating them as second-class citizens. The strong are to accept and receive the weak believers unconditionally, without reservation. They are to welcome them heartily into their inner circle, and into their hearts with warmth, kindness, and genuine love. That is the meaning of the Greek word for “to receive.”

The strong are to fellowship with the weak. The word koinônia (“fellowship”) appears first in Acts 2:42. “The believers devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and fellowship.” This fellowship is created by the Holy Spirit. So in our benediction we say, “May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all” (2 Cor. 13:14). John writes, “We proclaim to you what we have seen and heard, so that you also may have fellowship with us. And our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son, Jesus Christ” (1 John 1:3). This fellowship with God and with one another is created by the Holy Spirit.

Our fellowship is with the triune God and with all of God’s people, whether weak or strong. Therefore, welcome the weak, as Philemon was instructed to welcome his runaway slave. Paul says, “Welcome [Onesimus] as you would welcome me,” that is, with much love (Philem. 17). Welcome the weak, as Jesus welcomes his brothers and sisters into heaven (John 14:3).

Yes, that brother may be weak, but he is your brother and God’s son. God loved him from all eternity and in time effectually called and justified him, and he shall be glorified. His faith is weak. He is Mr. Little Faith. But he is not Mr. No Faith. Mr. Little Faith is a believer. His conscience is now weak, but God is not finished with him. God will in due time make him strong in the faith as he listens to the preaching of the word. Indeed, God’s ministers are appointed for that purpose: “It was he who gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelists, and some to be pastors and teachers, to prepare God’s people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up” (Eph. 4:11–12). And in essential things, the faith of the weak Christian is correct. He believes in 1 Corinthians 15:1–8, that Christ died for his sins according to the Scriptures and was raised for his justification.

The weak believers in Rome were mostly Jewish people. They were a minority. The strong were mostly Gentile believers, who were in the majority. The majority is commanded to welcome into their hearts the weak minority. The weak will in due time become mature and forsake childish things, so we hope.

Remember also that we all were once weak. Paul writes, “You see, at just the right time, when we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly” (Rom. 5:6). And the strong must help the weak: “In everything I did, I showed you that by this kind of hard work we must help the weak, remembering the words the Lord Jesus himself said: ‘It is more blessed to give than to receive’” (Acts 20:35). Elsewhere Paul says, “And we urge you, brothers, warn those who are idle, encourage the timid, help the weak, be patient with everyone” (1 Thess. 5:14). Remember, we have not yet arrived at the unity of faith. The ministers are to “prepare God’s people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ” (Eph. 4:12–13). That perfect unity is still future.

So the strong must receive the weak without quarreling over issues relating to things indifferent. Disputations seldom create unity. And we are not asked to receive into fellowship those who deny the essential doctrines of Christianity. Today, in the name of ecumenicalism, Christians are told to come together with Hindus, Muslims, atheists, Mormons, and Jehovah’s Witnesses and worship together. Such a gathering is a synagogue of Satan. That is not what Paul is telling us to do. We are not asked to receive people who deny the deity of Christ. But we are to receive weak Christians who are weak in issues that have nothing to do with our eternal salvation. The weak Christian’s weakness has nothing to do with moral issues. We are all in Christ, in the kingdom of God, and members of God’s family.

Paul practiced what he was teaching. He told the Corinthian church, “Though I am free and belong to no man, I make myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible. To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God’s law but am under Christ’s law), so as to win those not having the law. To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all men so that by all possible means I might save some. I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings” (1 Cor. 9:19–23). He also wrote, “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God. Do not cause anyone to stumble, whether Jews, Greeks or the church of God—even as I try to please everybody in every way. For I am not seeking my own good but the good of many, so that they may be saved” (1 Cor. 10:31–33).

The strong believe that ceremonial laws are now abrogated and that a believer can eat all sorts of things. In fact, John Mark’s gospel, written to the Roman church, disclosed the teaching of Jesus Christ that all food is clean (Mark 7:14–19). But the strong believer should not cause his superior knowledge to cause a weak believer to stumble. Paul taught, “Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up” (1 Cor. 8:1). We must love the weak, and in due time, he will become strong.

Don’t Despise the Weak or Condemn the Strong

The truth is, the strong are correct in their understanding. As believers in Christ, we can eat all kinds of food for which we give thanks to God. But we must never use this knowledge to despise the weak, who eat only vegetables. In verse 3 Paul uses the word exoutheneô, which means “despise.” In other words, the strong are commanded not to treat their weak brothers as nothings, as worthless. The slogan, “All things are lawful” is true (1 Cor. 6:12, KJV). But we must understand that all things do not edify. As strong believers, we have a responsibility to edify, to build up, and to make strong our weak brothers and sisters through love, sympathy, and the ministry of the word of God.

Earlier in this epistle Paul wrote, “God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Rom. 5:8). Christ himself loved us and died for us when we were weak, sinners, ungodly, and enemies of God. We must pay attention to what Paul told the Corinthians, “So if you think you are standing firm, be careful that you don’t fall” (1 Cor. 10:12). Despising our weak brothers is a sin; eating only vegetables is not a sin. And there is danger for the strong to become antinomians while exercising their freedom in Christ.

The weak also must avoid sinning. (PGM) There is a danger for the weak to be legalists. Beware of the tyranny of legalism! The weak have a tendency to condemn those who enjoy their gospel liberty. They sit in judgment on the strong. They may argue that unless people stop eating meat, they are not Christians. They may ask how people can be Christians if they eat meat, drink wine, wear jewelry, wear make-up, take medicine, watch movies, play football, invest their money to make a profit, spend money to fix their hair, use wedding rings as a symbol of marriage, and so on. They may even say that if people do not all become vegetarians, they cannot be saved! To such weak Christians I say, do not condemn the strong ones and sin terribly. Remove the plank from your own eye before you look for the speck in the eye of your brother (Matt. 7:5).

God Has Received All of Us

In verse 3 Paul gives the reason that weak and strong Christians must accept each other: “For God has received him.” Understand this truth: God has welcomed both the strong and the weak into his kingdom, his family, his church. Friends, the bride of Christ consists of the strong and the weak, those with little faith and those with great faith. Christ values us all as his bride. Whether weak or strong, we are his jewels, his treasure, and the apple of his eye.

If God has received us all into himself, into his heart, why do we sin against God by judging the strong and despising the weak? If God has received us all, then how can we not receive those whom God himself has received? Peter himself had to learn this lesson, as we read in Acts 10: “While Peter was still speaking these words, the Holy Spirit came on all who heard the message… . ‘Can anyone keep these people from being baptized with water? They have received the Holy Spirit just as we have.’ So he ordered that they be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ. Then they asked Peter to stay with them for a few days” (Acts 10:44, 47–48). And in Acts 11:17, Peter testified, “So if God gave them the same gift as he gave us, who believed in the Lord Jesus Christ, who was I to think that I could oppose God?”

We have no authority to condemn another’s house servant. We must mind our own business; we are not his master. We have no right to meddle, for “to his own master he stands or falls” (v. 4). The truth is, this Master loves his slave, and the slave loves his Master. And at the final judgment he shall be made able to stand, for his God and Master is mighty to make him stand.

This is the assurance we have of our salvation: if God saved us, we shall never fall or perish. So Jude concludes, “To him who is able to keep you from falling and to present you before his glorious presence without fault and with great joy” (Jude 24). Paul says, “being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus” (Phil. 1:6). Jesus declared, “I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one can snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. I and the Father are one” (John 10:28–30). And listen to what Paul says in Romans 8:31–39: What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us? He who did not spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all—how will he not also, along with him, graciously give us all things? Who will bring any charge against those whom God has chosen? It is God who justifies. Who is he that condemns? Christ Jesus, who died —more than that, who was raised to life —is at the right hand of God and is also interceding for us. Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine or nakedness or danger or sword? … For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Elsewhere, Peter speaks of believers as being through faith “shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time” (1 Pet. 1:5). And the Hebrew writer says, “Therefore he is able to save completely those who come to God through him, because he always lives to intercede for them.” (Heb. 7:25).

Our Lord is mighty to make us all stand! Not even one will fall or perish. He will make us all stand before God, when he judges us through our Lord Jesus Christ. This judgment will take place, Paul writes, “on the day when God will judge men’s secrets through Jesus Christ, as my gospel declares” (Rom. 2:16). He is mighty and able to make us stand.

Christ is able. So Paul says, “I pray also that the eyes of your heart may be enlightened in order that you may know the hope to which he has called you, the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is like the working of his mighty strength, which he exerted in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly realms” (Eph. 1:18-20). Paul also tells the Ephesians, “Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us” (Eph. 3:20; see also Col. 1:29, Phil. 4:13, and Eph. 6:10–11).

God chose to save, not the mighty, not the wise, not the influential, not those of noble birth, but us—the foolish, the weak, the lowly, the despised, the zeroes of this world to shame the mighty and the wise (1 Cor. 1:26–28). So we will stand!

In the final analysis, we all were weak, and we all were dead. But because of his great love and rich mercy, God saved the prostitute Rahab, the wretched man born blind, the miserable blind Bartimaeus, the sinful woman of Luke 7, the adulteress woman of John 8, the miserable thief on the cross, the chief sinner publican Zacchaeus, and us. Friends, we are weak, but our God is mighty. He saved us and he will save us. So receive, welcome, and love the weak so that they may become strong. Use your strength to build up the weak in the family of God.

Conclusion

In conclusion, consider the following points of application:

1. We were all weak, lost, and dead, but God saved us because of his great love and rich mercy (Eph. 2:1–4).
2. We are all brothers and sisters in God’s family.
3. So let us oppose all disunity and strive to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace (Eph. 4:3).
4. Let us see the sevenfold unity which binds us together—one body, one Spirit, one hope, one Lord, one faith, one baptism, and one God and Father, who is over all and through all and in all, from whom and through whom and unto him are all things—to him be glory forever (Eph. 4:4–6).
5. We need each other and our spiritual gifts. Each one is made strong by the gifts of the others.
6. We are not our brothers’ master, that we should deal with him in things indifferent.
7. Thank God for his delegated authorities, like parents and pastors, who train us in things that matter.
8. Never compromise in the essential doctrines of Christianity.
9. Be ready to compromise for the sake of the gospel in things indifferent (adiaphora).
10. Be ready to appreciate the fact that everyone is different in some ways. We are not exact copies of each other.
11. Live in love and minister to all with your gifts, so that all may grow up “until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ” (Eph. 4:11–16).
12. Let us avoid the dangers of the legalism of the weak and the antinomianism of the strong.
13. Christian fellowship should not be based on agreement on disputable matters, but based on the everlasting love of our triune God.
14. In essential Christian doctrines, there should be unity; in non-essentials, liberty; and in all things, charity.
15. The solution to the weak/strong problem is not to have a separate church for the strong and a different church for the weak. It is God’s will to have one church for all his people—for the weak and the strong, for the white and the black, for the brown and the yellow, for the tall and the small, for the rich and the poor, for the educated and the uneducated, and so on, because we are all God’s children.

May God help us practice love in God’s church family. And may those who are not part of God’s family, who are still dead in their trespasses and sins, be made alive even this day. Our God is mighty to save!