Healthy Living

Matthew 18:21-25
P. G. Mathew | Sunday, March 12, 2000
Copyright © 2000, P. G. Mathew

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?”

Jesus answered, “I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.

“Therefore, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his servants. As he began the settlement, a man who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. Since he was not able to pay, the master ordered that he and his wife and his children and all that he had be sold to repay the debt.

“The servant fell on his knees before him. ‘Be patient with me,’ he begged, ‘and I will pay back everything.’ The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.

“But when that servant went out, he found one of his fellow-servants who owed him a hundred denarii. He grabbed him and began to choke him. `Pay back what you owe me!’ he demanded.

“His fellow-servant fell to his knees and begged him, `Be patient with me, and I will pay you back.’

“But he refused. Instead, he went off and had the man thrown into prison until he could pay the debt. When the other servants saw what had happened, they were greatly distressed and went and told their master everything that had happened.

“Then the master called the servant in. ‘You wicked servant,’ he said, ‘I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow-servant just as I had on you?’ In anger his master turned him over to the jailers to be tortured, until he should pay back all he owed.

“This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from your heart.”

Matthew 18:21-35

In this study we want to examine the topic of healthy living. If I asked a roomful of people, “How many of you would like to be healthy?” I am sure everyone would raise his or her hand. We all want to live healthy lives, don’t we?

When we speak of health, we mean health of body and soul. Such comprehensive health can be obtained only through the Lord Jesus Christ. Healthy living in the true sense is experienced only by those whose sins have been forgiven by God through his Son, Jesus Christ. When such people have experienced God’s forgiveness, they will live lives of forgiveness toward others in the Christian community.

From time to time, a pastor must deal with this issue of forgiveness in his church community. Christians do sin against God and against their fellow believers, yet some refuse to repent. Additionally, some Christians refuse to forgive those who come to them in repentance. I have witnessed both of these situations–Christians refusing to repent and Christians refusing to forgive those who are repenting. Both situations are contrary to healthy living. In fact, in 1 Corinthians 11:30 Paul says it was because of sin in the church of Corinth that many had become weak and sick and a number of them died prematurely. The Corinthian church was a sick church because of the sin of its members.

God desires that we live healthy lives. In Exodus 15:26 God told his people, “For I am the LORD, who heals you,” and in 2 Peter 2:24 we read, “By his wounds you have been healed.” But a person can live a healthy life only when he repents and puts his faith in Jesus Christ and begins to forgive others. When we receive forgiveness from God for our infinite sin against him and practice a life of forgiveness toward our fellow believers, which includes our spouses and children, then we will be able to live healthy lives.

As we study this passage, I urge you to examine your own life and ask yourself these questions: Am I a healthy Christian? Have I been forgiven of all my sins by God? Am I living a life of forgiveness toward others in this church community?

A healthy church is a loving church, and a loving church is a repenting and forgiving church. Anyone who refuses to repent or forgive according to the Bible must be put out of the church. To maintain the health of the community, the unrepentant, unforgiving person must be removed, just as a cancerous organ must be surgically removed to maintain the health of a person.

Peter’s Question

This passage begins with Peter asking Jesus a question. In Matthew 18:21-22 we read, “Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, ‘Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?’ Jesus answered, ‘I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.'” Then Jesus proceeded to tell the parable of the unmerciful servant to illustrate and confirm his teaching about forgiveness.

In ancient Judaism there was a limit placed on the number of times one had to forgive another. Based on certain scriptures, such as Amos 1:3, 6, 9, and Job 33:29-30, rabbis taught that God will forgive his people up to three times, but by the fourth time, he would stop forgiving and begin to punish sin instead. The rabbis reasoned that if God forgives only three times and then punishes the fourth time, the fifth time, and so on, God’s people should imitate him and forgive sins three times only.

Peter came to Jesus with this idea that there is a limit to forgiveness. That is why he asked, “Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me?” The word for “against me” is not in some manuscripts, but whether Peter was speaking about private sin or sinning against the church doesn’t matter. His question was, “How many times must I forgive?”

When Peter asked his question, he was arguing for putting a limit on forgiveness, but, as one who had been taught by our Lord Jesus Christ, he was also trying to be very generous. Possibly he had in mind Jesus’ words, “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy,” when he asked his question. So Peter doubled the rabbinic limit of three and added one more for good measure, coming up with a proposed limit of seven times to forgive his brother.

Limitless Forgiveness

I am sure Peter thought that Jesus would be impressed by the generosity he was showing in the area of forgiveness. But how did Jesus respond? He rejected outright the idea of putting any limits on forgiveness. “Not seven times but seventy-seven times,” Jesus told Peter. In his response, Jesus was dealing with the core issue behind Peter’s question, which was man’s basic unwillingness to forgive others.

Man needs forgiveness continuously from God, and I am sure none of us wants to put any limits on the forgiveness we receive. But being sinful people, we seem to want to place limits when it comes to our forgiving those who have sinned against us. So when Jesus said we must forgive others seventy-seven times, he simply meant we must forgive without limit just as God forgives us. If we have experienced the infinite forgiveness by God for our infinite sin, then forgiveness should be a way of life for us all the days of our lives.

Now, we must realize that only a Christian has the capacity to forgive in this way. A Christian, therefore, should be the opposite of Lamech, Cain’s descendant, who made this boast in Genesis 4:24, “If Cain is avenged seven times, then Lamech seventy-seven times.” What did Lamech’s words mean? That he, an unbeliever, was committed to limitless vengeance.

That is the way of unbelieving world–there is limitless vengeance but no capacity to forgive. But a believer in Jesus Christ should do the exact opposite of an unbeliever. Because a Christian has received forgiveness, all of his life he can and should forgive others without limit. Just as he receives forgiveness from God for the sins he commits daily, so he must daily forgive those who sin against him.

Perhaps you are experiencing sickness in your spirit, mind, soul, or body. Have you ever thought that your sickness may be the result of your unwillingness to forgive someone? If so, I urge you to understand what I am saying and begin to live a healthy life of unlimited forgiveness.

The Parable of the Unmerciful Servant

Jesus told Peter that he must forgive others without limit and that forgiveness must be a way of life for him. He then confirmed and illustrated this point with a parable.

There was a great king, Jesus said, who had a number of servants with whom he decided to settle accounts. The king, who stands for God, called in his servants, and one man was brought before him who owed a large amount of money–ten thousand talents.

An Infinite Debt

How much was this servant’s debt? A talent was the highest measure of weight used at that time. Jesus didn’t say if the talents were of copper, silver or gold, but I would guess that he would be referring to talents of gold. Ten thousand was the highest number used at that time, just as today we use the number billion.

So if a talent was the highest measure of weight, and ten thousand was the highest number used, a debt of ten thousand talents of gold would mean an infinite sum of money that no man would ever be able to repay. This ten thousand talents of gold stands for our infinite debt, our unmeasureable guilt before the infinite God.

Total Inability to Pay

Not only did the servant have the problem of an infinite debt, but he had an additional problem: He was unable to pay his debt. This illustrates the total inability of man to meet the demands of infinite God.

We are morally incapable because we are pervasively depraved by nature. As we read in Romans 3, all have sinned and come short of the glory of God, and there is none righteous–not even one. All men are dead in trespasses and sins, as we read in Ephesians 2. All men are morally incapable of satisfying the divine demand to pay up; thus, all men justly deserve divine wrath and eternal punishment.

Total Forgiveness

However, in Jesus’ parable the servant received total forgiveness from the king. When the king first heard of the enormity of the servant’s debt, he ordered him to be bound, together with his wife and children, and thrust into prison until he paid up. That was equivalent to sentencing him to eternal hell, because there is no way that anyone could pay up such an infinite debt and ever be released.

When he heard the king’s sentence, the servant fell down, prostrating himself before the king, which is a symbol of repentance, and began to plead with him, saying, “Be patient with me and I will pay back everything.” In Eastern language, it means, “Forgive me,” because the king knew there was absolutely no way this man is going to be able to repay such an enormous debt. And in verse 27 we read, “The servant’s master took pity on him, canceled the debt and let him go.”

Salvation by Grace Alone

What was Jesus teaching here? That salvation is by grace alone. We often use the phrase sola gratia, which means that by grace alone–not on the basis of human merit–we receive salvation from Jesus Christ.

What this servant merited was imprisonment for the rest of his life, not only for him but for his wife and children. But in response to the servant’s cry for mercy, the king showed mercy to him. He released his servant and canceled his infinite debt.

By nature we are in the same condition as the servant. In Adam all have sinned, and what we deserve is eternal hell and separation from God. But our God is a God of mercy, and he will freely pardon all our sins when we repent and trust in Christ.

God justifies us by grace alone. In Romans 4:5 we read the phrase, “God who justifies the wicked.” I had a hard time believing this amazing statement when I first heard it, but it is true: God justifies the ungodly. And in Romans 4:7-8 Paul quotes Psalm 32, saying, “Blessed are they whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sins are covered,” meaning atoned for. “Blessed is the man whose sin the Lord will never count against him.” When we trust in Christ, the Lord does not count our sins against us!

God will never hold our sins against us. Yet there are people in the church who always keep the sin of the husband or the sin of the wife in the forefront of their minds, ever reminding themselves of it, even after the offending person has asked for forgiveness. If you are such a person, it is time that you listened to the word of God and began to live a life of forgiveness. Otherwise, I warn you: your health is at stake.

“Blessed is the man whose sin the Lord will never count against him.” Paul is speaking about justification by grace alone apart from any human merit. This is the glory of the gospel. He who knew no sin became sin for us that we might become the righteousness of God in him.

When God forgives us, all our sins are lifted off our shoulders. “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest,” Jesus tells us in Matthew 11:28. This is what happens when we, in true repentance and faith, trust in Jesus Christ alone, prostrating ourselves before him and saying, “I have nothing. I plead not for justice but for mercy. I understand from the Bible that you are a God of mercy and I pray that you have mercy on me.”

Additionally, our sins are covered and atoned for, canceled in full and passed over by God because of the blood of Christ. Just as God passed over the houses of the Israelites in Egypt when he saw the blood on the doorposts, so also, on the basis of our trust in the blood shed by Jesus Christ on the cross, he cancels our sins and lifts our burdens off our shoulders. He makes us free at last!

The Responsibility to Show Mercy

If the king, meaning God, shows infinite mercy to us and forgives our sins daily, how then must we live toward our fellow servants-our husbands, our wives, our children, and our brothers and sisters in the community of God? We have a responsibility to forgive them.

We ought to imitate God as his dear children and forgive those who repent and seek forgiveness of us. The Bible says we love God because he first loved us; therefore, we must love our brothers and forgive them.

He who has received grace must be gracious. In the Greek the word charizomai means to show grace. Now, did the servant in this parable show grace toward his fellow servant? He owed him only a few dollars–a hundred denarii, which was the wages of one hundred days for a laborer. No, he refused to be merciful. His fellow servant begged for mercy, and the Greek word is parakalei, which means he continuously asked. But the unforgiving servant continuously refused to forgive–ouk êthelen. He had just come from the very presence of the king who forgave him, and yet he refused to be merciful to his fellow servant.

This wicked servant did not adhere to the idea of forgiving seventy times seven, as Jesus was teaching. He wanted God to deal with him on the basis of mercy, but he wanted to deal with everyone else on the basis of law. In fact, if you had to come up with a slogan for the unforgiving servant, it would be “Mercy for me, but justice for you.”

In my pastoral experience, I have pleaded with people to forgive others, but some have refused. But I must warn such people that God will deal with you if you don’t forgive others. He can make your life very unhealthy.

Forgiven Must Forgive

The unmerciful servant grabbed his fellow servant, began to choke him, and demanded his money from him–an infinitesimally small sum compared to the infinitely great sum he had been forgiven. The other servant pleaded for mercy, but the unmerciful servant refused to listen. He had the other man thrown into prison.

When the king heard about this, he had the unmerciful servant brought before him for judgment. The king addressed him: “You wicked servant,” and then there is emphasis, “I canceled all that debt of yours because you begged me to. Shouldn’t you have had mercy on your fellow servant just as I had on you?” In other words, he was saying, “I forgave all of your infinitely great debt, and I expected you to forgive your fellow servants. Just as I showed mercy to you, you ought also to have shown mercy.”

Here we find the king teaching the divine principle that those who are forgiven of God must forgive. Forgiveness is not just an option for Christians: it is our divine duty. Forgiveness is not something that we decide to do because we are nice. We are commanded by God to forgive our wives and husbands and brothers and sisters in Jesus Christ. But this servant refused to forgive his fellow servant.

Why do you think this servant refused to forgive? Why do you think people in the church today also refuse to forgive? We can come up with a number of reasons.

Appreciating the Depth of Our Sin

The first reason is that the servant did not consider the depth of his own sin. He did not fully understand the infinite nature of his debt to the king. This is true of us today as well. Sin has been so discounted in today’s world that it is considered to be nothing, a concept that no one is interested in anymore.

I think it is time that we gave serious thought to the enormity of our debt before all-holy God. It is infinite sin and infinite guilt, like an unrepayable debt. If you are refusing to forgive others, you, like the unmerciful servant, may not be appreciating the magnitude of your own infinite sin before God.

Appreciating the Magnitude of God’s Grace

Second, because he failed to appreciate the magnitude of his debt, the unmerciful servant also failed to appreciate the magnitude of the infinite grace of God. In Romans 5:20 we read, “Where sin increased, grace increased all the more.” The unmerciful servant didn’t appreciate the great grace shown to him by the king in forgiving his infinite debt.

In the same way, our unwillingness to forgive demonstrates that we don’t appreciate the fact that God did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all in his death on the cross for our sins. We are demonstrating a view that grace is cheap, even though grace is, in reality, extremely costly, because it required the incarnation and death of our Lord Jesus Christ.

In Luke 7:47 Jesus said, “He who has been forgiven little loves little.” I hope God will give us some understanding of the enormity of our sin and the infinite greatness of his abounding grace.

The apostle Paul was one who understood something of his sin and the grace God showed him in saving him, as we read in 1 Timothy 1:15-17. Paul begins by saying, “Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners–of whom I am the worst.” Have you ever thought about this? If Paul said he was the worst of sinners, there is no question we are also considered the worst of sinners.

Then Paul continues, “But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive eternal life.”

Then Paul begins to praise God because he has a correct estimation of God’s grace to him. He says, “Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God, be honor and glory for ever and ever. Amen.”

This is what will happen when we also begin to appreciate God’s grace. Like the apostle Paul, we will praise and thank our God for his great mercy to us.

Lacking Fear of God

The third reason the servant was unmerciful is that he lacked any fear of God. He had a poor, superficial notion of God. Unlike the apostle Paul, he could not sing this, “Now to the King eternal, immortal, invisible, the only God. . . .” He did not understand that God is the self-existing, self-sufficient, eternal, almighty, all-wise, all-holy God, who has no need and by whose will the cosmos and everything in it continues to exist. If this man had seen God as he is and feared him, he would not have acted as he did toward the other servant.

We must have a healthy respect for God! To come from God’s presence, having been forgiven a great debt, and then begin to choke and mistreat your fellow servant for a small thing means you have no fear of God.

Punishment for the Unmerciful

In response to the behavior of the unmerciful servant, the king became angry and punished him. He turned the wicked servant over to torturers to torment him. This may be a picture of hell.

Now, this passage presents a problem, if we are saying it represents a believer being thrown into hell. Why? We believe in the eternal security of a believer. A true believer cannot lose his salvation. So it could be that this person’s salvation was false.

Another clue that this person may have been a false believer is that a true believer normally will not continually refuse to forgive his fellow servant. The evidence of being shown mercy by God is that we show mercy to our fellow believers.

But there is another view about this particular punishment the king meted out. He sent him to prison, entrusting him to torturers to torment him until he paid up the infinite debt, which means never. Some people would say this is a picture of purgatory. They would say that when a believer who lived an unforgiving life dies, he will go to purgatory to suffer punishment which will bring about purification of his soul until he is ready to go to heaven. The only problem with this view is that purgatory is a human invention, not a biblical doctrine. The Bible says when a believer dies, he goes to be with Christ.

In my own studies, I have come to the conclusion that this may represent the punishment meted out on his people by Jesus Christ, the head of the church–a certain chastisement in this temporal life for those who refuse to forgive. We have said before that a true believer may live an unforgiving life, and I am sure all of us have experienced that to some degree or another. A true believer certainly can sin, and not forgiving one’s brother or sister is sin. I believe one may continue in this condition for some time or even until death.

I think an unforgiving person will experience divine chastisement in this temporal life–not in purgatory but here and now. We find evidence for this view in the Bible. In 1 Corinthians 5 we read of a man who was living with his father’s wife in violation of biblical law, and in verse 5 Paul directs the church to “hand this man over to Satan, so that the sinful nature may be destroyed and his spirit saved on the day of the Lord.” Now, we don’t know exactly what that means, but it doesn’t sound like having much of a good time. Destruction of the sinful nature is divine discipline and yet, in the midst of it, we find the gospel also, that “his spirit may be saved on the day of the Lord.” So this passage may be speaking about a true believer being disciplined severely, even to the point of death.

In 1 Corinthians 11:30 we read that the people in the church of Corinth were not caring for one another in a Christian manner. What were the consequences of their sin? Paul writes, “That is why many among you are weak and sick, and a number of you have fallen asleep.” And in verse 32 he says, “When we are judged by the Lord, we are being disciplined so that we will not be condemned with the world.” Here again we find salvation in the midst of chastisement, but if you asked me, “How would you like to be disciplined by the Lord?” my answer would be, “No. I would rather repent than to be handed over to Satan for discipline.”

We know that true believers do not lose their salvation, but if they refuse to repent of their sins, they shall suffer in this life. It may be that you are suffering even now as a result of sin. But suppose you want to live a healthy life. If so, you should live a life of love and forgiveness. You should make every effort to ensure that you are living in harmony with God and with your brothers and sisters in the body of Christ.

How to Live a Healthy Life

Let us, then, come to some practical application. In Matthew 18:35 Jesus sums up this teaching on forgiveness with the statement: “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you unless you forgive your brother from the heart.”

What was Jesus saying? “Peter and everyone else, get rid of this foolish idea that there is a limit on how many times you can forgive someone. Don’t you realize that you yourselves live daily and moment by moment only by the sheer grace and mercy of God? If God has forgiven you, how can you ever refuse to forgive another?”

First, then, we must notice that this is a warning to all believers. “This is how my heavenly Father will treat each of you,” Jesus said. It is a warning to us, and we shouldn’t hide behind our doctrine of eternal security and neglect to preach this truth. It is a warning of God to all who refuse to forgive.

Second, we must realize that this warning is given to each believer. In other words, God gives the charge to forgive as a divine duty to every single believer. It is a must. And in the light of this parable, we can conclude that the sin of not forgiving one’s brother is one of the most horrible sins a person can commit, requiring the most severe punishment.

Third, we must realize that it is our brothers and sisters in Christ that we are to forgive. If someone in the church has sinned against us, we must realize that that person is our brother, a child of God, redeemed by Jesus Christ. God loves him, Christ loves him, and the Holy Spirit loves him. How dare we not forgive a fellow child of God who repents and asks our forgiveness?

Fourth, we are to forgive from our hearts. I have heard it said, “I will forgive but not forget.” Such a statement is pure nonsense. We must forgive the way God has forgiven us–unconditionally, unstingily, freely. The result of forgiveness is full restoration of us to God so that we can enjoy full fellowship with him. That is what forgiving means. If we have forgiven, there should be a full flow of love between us and God and us and our brother.

We should forgive as God has forgiven us. Ephesians 4:32 tells us, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” And in Colossians 3:13 we read, “Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” This is the way and the manner in which we should forgive others.

Biblical Forgiveness

How has God forgiven us? On the basis of atonement. The Lord Jesus Christ died on the cross, shedding his blood–the blood of the covenant, the infinite price paid by Christ–for our sake. That is the basis for all forgiveness.

Forgiveness is also based on repentance, as we read in Luke 17:3-4. It tells us that if our brother comes to us and says he repents, we must forgive him, even if he does the same thing seven times in the same day.

Our God is a forgiving God. Nehemiah 9:17 describes God as the “God of pardons,” and in Daniel 9:9 we read, “The Lord our God is merciful and forgiving.” In Isaiah 43:25 God himself tells us, “I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more,” and in Isaiah 38:17 we read that he casts our transgressions behind his back. That is anthropomorphism, but the idea is that he doesn’t see them again. In Micah 7:19 we read that he casts our sins into the depths of the sea, and in Psalm 103:12 we read that as far as the east is from the west, so far has he removed our sins from us.

What do all these expressions mean? They tell us that God’s forgiveness is total and complete. The transaction is done.

When God forgives us, he reconciles us to him and calls us to fellowship with him. Forgiveness requires full fellowship in our heart, spirit, mind, soul, and body. There shouldn’t be any reservation, in other words. And what is the source of forgiveness? The divine, infinite mercy shown to us by God.

How does a lack of forgiveness affect prayer? Well, have you ever wondered why God didn’t answer your prayer? If so, read Matthew 5:23-24 and Mark 11:25. According to these passages, what should you do when you stand praying? Forgive. And if you are an offending party, but you come for prayer and there remember that you did something wrong to somebody, you should stop praying, get out and take care of that matter. Then you can come back and worship, and God will hear your prayer.

Are You Living a Healthy Life?

In conclusion, I want to make two points. First, there are some people who are totally sick. They have never received forgiveness from Jesus Christ for their sins. Such people have never understood the infinity of their sin. Such people are under God’s wrath.

If you find yourself in this category, I have good news for you: there is a way out. You must fall prostrate before God and pray the prayer of the publican, “God, have mercy upon me, a sinner.” Cry out to God, trust in the blood that is sprinkled upon the mercy seat, and you will go home, like the publican did, justified.

I want to lead you to a healthy life, and the place to start is to repent and believe on the Lord Jesus Christ. Then you shall be saved. All your sins will be wiped out, blotted out, remembered no more, cast into the depth of the sea, cast behind his back. Then you will be restored to perfect fellowship with the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. Then you will enjoy eternal life, which is to know God, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom he has sent.

Second, if you are a believer, let me ask you one question: Are you living a healthy life in the way we just spoke about? I believe that some believers are very unhealthy because they will not forgive their husbands or wives or others in the church. They are those who say, “Mercy for me and justice for you.” But it doesn’t work that way. God wants us to say, “Mercy for me and mercy for you.”

If you have been living an unforgiving life, my prayer is that you will begin to forgive even now. Then you can be released from all bondage and psychosomatic trouble you are now experiencing.

Our God does not lie: as we repent and forgive others, he will forgive and restore us to himself. Therefore, may we forgive those who have sinned against us. May we repent and ask forgiveness of others whom we offended. May God have mercy upon us! Amen.