Living Words of a Dying Saint

By A Sister In Christ

Psalm 116:7 says, “Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.” We read this psalm the morning before I went in a cancer screening. At the time, that verse really stood out to me.

I have gone in for these screenings every few months ever since I was diagnosed and treated for cancer several years ago. Every time, I have to ask myself if I am prepared for whatever the Lord will bring my way. This time my husband and I barely made it home from the hospital when I was immediately called in for further testing. We soon learned that the cancer had spread and I am now receiving what the doctors call supportive care. They are no longer able to treat the cancer or remove it by surgery, as we have done in the past.

Having faced this enemy of cancer for over four years, I am struck by the way cancer is to the body as sin is to the soul. Without medical technology, I would not even be aware that the cancer is spreading. Neither I nor the doctors can feel or see it, but it is there, waiting to take my life. So also sin, when unchecked, quietly grows, desiring to bring about the final destruction of our souls. We do not feel it nor do we give any thought to it until the light of God’s word comes in and reveals its presence.

When the doctor said to me a few years ago, “You have cancer; the only hope is to surgically remove it,” I did not say, “You are lying. Please just take a part of it. Leave a bit.” No, I said, “Remove it completely. I do not care about the pain. Let me live. And thank you so much for helping me.” Yet how strange it is that when a pastor or a parent or a boss says, “I see a problem in your life,” whether it is laziness or stubbornness or arrogance or some other sin, we accuse that person of lying.

My favorite book in the Bible is the book of Ephesians. Chapter 2 told me the truth about my condition: “As for you, you were dead in your transgression and sins, in which you used to live when you followed the ways of this world and of the ruler of the kingdom of the air, the spirit who is now at work in those who are disobedient. All of us also lived among them at one time, gratifying the desires of our sinful nature and following its desires and thoughts. Like the rest, we were by nature objects of wrath” (Eph. 2:1-3). For twenty-six years I was an object of wrath. And I would still be one but for God’s word, which came to me through Pastor Mathew thirty years ago. He did not lie to me or tell me that I was okay. He told me that I needed to repent and trust in Jesus Christ.

When we refuse the truth, not the truth that we might die, but that we are dead-dead in our sin (a condition that is so clear in God’s word), we also reject the cure. We reject the following verses in Ephesians that say, “But because of his great love for us, God, who is rich in mercy, made us alive with Christ even when we were dead in transgressions. It is by grace you have been saved. . . . For it is by grace you have been saved through faith-and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God-not by works, so that no one can boast” (Eph. 3:4-5, 8-9).

What about you? Have you received this gift of God that alone can bring your dead soul to life? Or are you refusing the truth of God’s word even as you hear it every time you come to church? Young people, do you obey your parents? Do you enjoy the word of God? Or is it drudgery to come to church? If this is true of you, the cancer of sin is growing in you, even though you do not know it.

The burden of my heart is for the young people in this church. You have the opportunity to live for Christ and enjoy great blessing-not a promise of health, wealth, and prosperity, but the promise that God will be ever-near you, so that on the day you hear dreadful news, whatever form it comes in, or face whatever hardship or trouble that comes your way, you will be able to say with confidence, “The Lord has been good to me.”

I can truly say with confidence that God has been good to me. He placed me here thirty years ago under the care of a faithful pastor and faithful leaders who have been unafraid to correct me and speak the truth to me, even when it was painful. We are also indebted to each of you who have walked faithfully with us for many years. We are grateful for the word of God that sustains us and that is near us-it is in our hearts and in our minds. We do not lose heart because the word of God is true. My trouble is light and it is momentary.

I would ask you to examine yourself: Are you a Christian? Can you say in the face of death, “God is with me. My troubles are light and momentary”? Whether you have been here for thirty years or three years, whether you were born in this church or whether you have just come in recent years, are you a Christian?

I want to share a few verses that have been particularly helpful to us. Last week we came to the office before going to get the results of one test. Pastor Mathew prayed for us and read to us from Deuteronomy 1: “Then I said to you, ‘Do not be terrified; do not be afraid of them. The Lord your God, who is going before you, will fight for you, as he did for you in Egypt, before your very eyes, and in the desert. There you saw how the Lord your God carried you, as a father carries his son, all the way you went until you reached this place'” (Deut. 1:29-31). We know God is going to carry us, help us, and sustain us by his mighty hand.

Psalm 46 has also been a great comfort to me: “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,” and I can add, though the cancer is growing and it appears that I will soon die, “though its waters roar and foam and the mountains quake with their surging,” though there is pain to come in the days ahead. This describes the trials we face. But if we continue, we read, “There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy place where the Most High dwells. God is within her, she will not fall; God will help her at break of day” (Ps. 46:1-5). And I will leave you with verse 7: “The Lord Almighty is with us; the God of Jacob is our fortress.”

Comments by Pastor Mathew: I came here to minister at the prayer meeting the other day and want to share a few scriptures I shared there. Exodus 34:29: “When Moses came down from Mount Sinai with the two tablets of the Testimony in his hands, he was not aware that his face radiant because he had spoken with the Lord.” Moses was on the mountain for forty days and nights without eating and drinking. When he came down, his face was beaming, but he was not aware. We also read that every time Moses went into the presence of God, he came out with a radiant face (Ex. 34:33-35).

David was probably reflecting on the experience of Moses when he wrote, “Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame” (Ps. 34:5). Acts 6:15 speaks about Stephen who was full of the Holy Spirit: “All who were sitting in the Sanhedrin looked intently at Stephen, and they saw that his face was like the face of an angel.” (PGM) Paul writes, “And we, who with unveiled faces all reflect [or behold] the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit” (2 Cor. 3:18).

I spoke here last Sunday night about Christ our burden-bearer. When I got into my car afterwards, and the Holy Spirit directed me to observe our sister coming out with her husband. There I saw a radiant face. After thirty years of looking to God, she is being transformed into God’s likeness. She is a radiant image-bearer of God. I am sure she understands everything this disease can do to her. And yet her face had a supernatural radiance that she was not aware of, but I saw. What a blessing to be raised from the dead by God’s great love and rich mercy, and be transformed from glory to glory! Hebrews 2:10 says the mission of our Lord Jesus Christ is to bring many sons to glory. We are destined for glory, and our sister is experiencing some of that glory even now. My prayer is that we all pay heed to her words and trust in Jesus Christ for our eternal salvation.